When you go through a divorce, the hardest part is facing a future without the partner you thought you’d be with forever. Only slightly less difficult, however, is the process of creating a custody agreement – who gets custody of the children and how that custody will be shared. You want to spare your children as much pain as possible while still remaining a force in their lives. If ever there was a time to work as partners once more, this is it. Here are some tips on how to work together to resolve parental rights issues and work out a custody agreement that won’t break your family.
Some parents particularly in cases of amicable divorce are able to work out custody through informal discussions. They are capable of sitting down and resolving all issues of visitation, scheduling, and parental rights, and only need to call upon the services of an attorney to finalize the agreement. This is the best of all possible scenarios. If you can get past your pain, grief and anger, you may be able to work things out as is best for everyone involved.
This is perhaps the least desirable of the methods available to you. When negotiations completely break down and the divorce becomes very adversarial, the courts can step in. A judge will review each side case usually presented by their divorce attorneys and make a determination regarding which parent is best able to care for the child. The court will determine the best sharing of custody, visitation rights and scheduling, and the parents will be mandated to abide by these rulings, possibly in a supervised setting. This can create a lot of anguish and stress for the family and the children specifically.
Mediation and Custody Agreement
For many, an alternative dispute resolution in the form of mediated divorce can be an ideal middle ground. In a mediated divorce, a neutral third party who is well-versed in divorce laws and experienced in handling sensitive issues will help you resolve your differences. This mediator is a trained expert in helping couples get past negative feelings such as pain and anger in order to work together as a team once more. This ability will be vital as you move forward to raise your child.
Mediated divorces are less expensive than court proceedings. They allow you to maintain your privacy. They help you to overcome resentment, bitterness and blame. They can, in some cases, help to find a friendship or at least an abiding partnership out of the destruction of a romantic relationship. Certainly, they are one of the best options for couples to make the decisions that are best for their family while shielding their children from the pain and trauma that results from their parents battling it out.
If you think that mediated divorce may help you to work out your custody agreement, don’t wait. Give us a call for more information and a consultation today.