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Thinking of Separating? What You Should Do First

I Just Separated. What Should I Do Next?

Are you thinking of divorce or separation from your spouse? Have you recently separated? Feeling lost and unsure of where to turn or what you should be doing next? Your approach in dealing with your spouse during and after separation can have a tremendous impact on how your matters are resolved. Here are four key steps that you should take when you first separate.

Separation or Divorce: Seek Professional Advice

Many of the issues that often surround divorce and separation can be quickly de-escalated with the support of a professionally trained advisor, such as a well-respected divorce mediator or an experienced family law lawyer. Swiftly obtaining professional advice can save you significant stress and money in the long run, as well as ensuring you understand your rights and obligations while working toward building an effective and productive strategy to resolve your issues. A well-trained divorce mediator specializes in applying practical techniques for dealing with your separation, salvaging what’s left of your relationship, and creating a positive path to move forward separately. Don’t wait to engage a mediator or family lawyer – generally speaking, the sooner, the better.

Don’t Make Any Promises (or Threats!)

It is important that you try not to take any specific position with your spouse regarding your separation without knowing your legal rights and obligations. Instead, commit to working together toward a settlement that works for your family as a whole. Acknowledge that while you may need some help getting to a mutually agreeable resolution, you want to work toward that goal.

Separate the Legal from the Non-Legal

Of course, any divorce or separation involves emotional and relationship issues. While all issues are important, the legal system is often not the place for the emotional and relationship issues to be resolved. People that are able to separate the legal issues from the non-legal issues are often those that are able to resolve their legal dispute quickly and constructively. Make an investment in yourself and attend counselling, read some books on how to get through a divorce or take a course such as those offered by Howard and Kerry Parsons.

Don’t Panic!

People make the best decisions when they are able to use rational, left-brain thinking. Try to relax and avoid making decisions about your separation or divorce when you are angry, afraid or upset. Take the time and space you need (and seek the professional advice you need) to be able to make a sound decision.

Choose To Do It Right

It is important to understand the dispute resolution options that are available to you and select a divorce process that you believe will allow you to achieve your goals. Our expert divorce mediation team can assist you with identifying the best dispute resolution process to suit your needs and those of your family. If the best option for you involves the legal system, our sister firm Jones Divorce Law LLP can assist you with a wealth of family and divorce law expertise. Connect with us to learn more and book a consultation today.